A phase of self discovery

Over the past few months, I set out to explore what it might mean to “build something of my own”. At first, I thought it was about starting a business but I quickly realized I didn’t have the kind of ambition, urgency, or direction that founders often talk about. What I really wanted was to create, to design, build, and experiment, not to chase customers or worry about survival.

I built a few small tools and prototypes that I’m genuinely proud of, but nothing close to something I could live off yet. And that’s okay. I’ve learned that what excites me is working on creative mini-projects, not necessarily building a company.

Still, it was a tough phase. I lost my creative spark, my sleep, and even confidence in myself. Panic attacks and night chills were real. Now that I can build anything, every choice felt heavy. I slowly accept that some direction, stability and purpose are what bring out the best in me.

Now that I’ve joined a startup, surrounded by ex-founders who understand this journey, I feel both grounded and inspired. I’m thankful for this experience — for the people I met, the lessons I learned, and for realizing that doing my own thing doesn’t have to mean running a business. Sometimes it just means finding joy in the craft, wherever you are.